Soul Mates
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that’s holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your live just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. And thank God for it. ”
— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love
First things first…have you read Eat, Pray, Love
What does “Soul Mate” mean to you?
Here is the official definition according to the American Heritage Dictionary…soul mate: n. One of two persons compatible with each other in disposition, point of view, or sensitivity.
Not very romantic, huh?
Here in America (I’ve read that this is truly a Western idea), we tend to think of a Soul Mate as the perfect ROMANTIC partner….your ONE TRUE LOVE. Girls are raised on fairy tales so most women believe in the idea of finding her Prince Charming. Even some otherwise cynical, logical, analytical, intelligent men secretly believe in the fairy tale.
My hubby and I couldn’t be more different if we tried. But we both think that’s what makes our relationship interesting. We challenge each other constantly and because of these differences, we are constantly learning new ways of thinking about life. I do believe he is the ONE TRUE LOVE of my life and my best friend. But Soul Mate? Not even close!
My sister…yes, she’s a Soul Mate. We complete each other’s sentences. Hell, half the time we don’t even have to actually say any words at all to get what the other is thinking or feeling. My friend Gina…we were meant to be sisters. Same thing, we finish each other’s sentences. We think exactly alike on just about every topic we’ve ever discussed. My friend Kelly…definitely. We even creeped ourselves out once when comparing childhoods (which were seemingly VERY different) and kept finding identical experiences, even though we grew up in different states, different types of communities, and didn’t even meet until we were both married with children. The first time we met, we felt an immediate connection, as if we’d known each other for years. What else do these three amazing women have in common? I have learned SO much from each one of them. At the same time, we have a lot of fun together, and can totally be ourselves.
What do you think? Is a Soul Mate a mythical romantic figure or a more down-to-earth reality, not necessarily having anything at all to do with romance? Have you found your Soul Mate(s)?
Thanks for stopping by!
good post
Thank you!
God I love that book!!! (Like your new picture too!)
I have had the “soul mate” experiences the way Elizabeth defines it. (I say that like we’re old friends, but if you’ve read the book you’ll understand!)
Until the book, I thought my dh and I were missing something. Now, I feel more confident than ever about us (rather than doubtful because I didn’t feel the fairy tale every day.) Guess what? There is no freaking fairy tale! It’s just life and what YOU do with it, not what it does for you. There is no ever after, it is a lot of hard work. And worth it.
Love this post!
my soul mates are my children — forever connected in a way such that they know me and i know them, with very little ever having needed to be said. i will love them forever, no conditions, and feel connected in a way that no other person can possibly compete with.
my husband is no soul mate — i have written about him in my own blog on here. if anything, he is my anti-soul mate — maybe it can be hard to distinguish the two at first, like the fine line between love and hate?
but my kids? we are joined forever.
I agree that I will love my kids forever, no conditions, and feel connected in a way that no other person can possibly compete with. I follow your blog and completely understand why your hubby isn’t a soul mate. But, I never thought about my kids being soul mates…interesting. I’ll have to think about that some more. Thanks for reading & posting!
I sincerely believe each love of my life has been a soulmate. Also, I feel like a lamb among wolves. But that’s just what I feel like today(!)
Soulmates can be disguised. The contrasts of what we do want and what we don’t want are gifts.
Ohhh I’ve always believed in this – but I call it “kindred spirits,” stolen from Anne of Green Gables and her friendship with Diana. I have a few in my life – and all are females! Yay!